Meditation Journal

Slow start today, very encumbered especially thinking about music.  One insight I had was that my head is constantly filled with music. I think about particular songs and usually at any one time I have a song in my head.  This started when I was in middle school or so, which was a particularly tough time for me growing up.  I was feeling very alienated and that's about when I remember realizing that I always had a tune going on.  I would walk to school (pre-Walkman, or at least before I had access to one) and think about how it was kind of cool that I had my own radio station with me.

Interestingly, when I realized this I was able to let go of the music and experience silence, or at least the kind of silence you get when you're in your house and have various appliances humming and so forth.  It was tough to stay with it but for the most part I could.